Why Bazooka Joe is My New Hero


It happened again this morning. Everything happened. I “sort of” woke up to my alarm, felt like one of those people in the NyQuil ads (you know, BEFORE they decide to use the NyQuil), and desperately wanted to be allowed to drift back into a restful slumber. I got out of bed anyway, because it was time to deal with The Child. One does not “simply” deal with The Child.

Oh, I do apologize for not introducing myself first – how rude of me: welcome to my new blog. My name is Becky Hunter, and I am a Princess Herder. (Cue dramatic background music)

Most mornings with The Child can be quite the chore. Poor thing just can’t seem to wake up, even when we manage to get her to bed on time the night before. She is going to be 7 in a month, and is really a very sweet and intelligent girl. She just has a difficult time rising in the morning (especially on chilly mornings). Hey, I can totally relate (please refer to paragraph one, above). So, naturally, I was expecting to have to go through the whole tug-of-war game with her again, this morning. I dragged myself out of the warmth of my blankets and zombie-walked into the younger two girls’ bedroom. It was devoid of humans, to my surprise. Robby (my husband) had managed to get her right out of bed. Well… bless my soul, it was going to be an easy morning for us. I celebrated by lying down again. After about 10 extra minutes of resting, I got up and went about my normal morning routine. I took supplements, drank water, and got a cup of coffee. I decided to eat a granola bar for breakfast. After the other kids had left for school, Robby went to check on The Child. There was a Child’s shoe missing. Oh no – please, no. We were having a really good morning. Please, for the love of all things imaginable, make this stop!!! Robby did his best to help her, but he had to leave for work, so I took over.

Naturally, I found the lost shoe in a matter of seconds. My secret? I actually looked for it, instead of standing there, waiting for it to come to me on its own. The morning was saved, until…

The Child put her shoes on, and went to brush her hair. The brush was missing. What??? She went down to the basement to see if her older sister had taken it to her room. That’s when I began to feel extremely nauseated. I guess I waited too long to eat after taking my supplements. I hadn’t felt that way since the last time I was pregnant. We had about 15 minutes to leave, if we were going to walk. Where was The Child? She was taking forever to get that brush. Perhaps she was hurt. I should go check on her – no, no. Don’t get up. Too dizzy. Ugh. This is not acceptable. I went to the bathroom, which proved to be uneventful. So I did what always helped when I experienced morning sickness. I decided to lie down again. Finally, The Child emerged from the basement and asked me what was wrong. I explained, and she said that she never found the brush (really, she spent 10 minutes on that?) and whined, “Ohhh, who will take me to school now???!?”. I told her not to worry about that and to check the dining table (which was on her way to the basement, mind you). Yes, there it was. Now we had about 5 minutes to leave on time and I was still doubled over in agony on my bed. After about a minute of deep breathing and about 3 belches, I felt fine. So I got up and threw on some warm clothes.

We managed to make it to her school about 10 minutes before the bell rang. Not too shabby.

It was during my walk home that I decided to write this blog. I was inspired by something that I truly hate: abc gum. For those who don’t know, that means “already been chewed” gum, and I abhor it. As I was rounding a corner of the sidewalk, I glanced down. I noticed that I had nearly stepped right into a gigantic wad of abc gum. I’d just missed having this disgusting goo imbedded in the sole of my sneaker. Eww. That was close. Wait a minute – I missed stepping in it on the way to the school, as well. Even The Child managed to skirt it, in spite of the fact that it was placed in an area where one of us should have planted our foot smack down on the blasted thing. I don’t know exactly why, but this encounter with improperly discarded, recreational resin became very spiritual for me.

It occurred to me, in that very moment, that even when it seems like absolutely everything is going awry, it is important to notice that there are things that go right. A series of mishaps caused a delay in leaving the house on time, but neither The Child nor I were forced to spend the remainder of the day with chewed-then-spewed chiclet adhered to the bottom of our shoe. In the story of Pollyanna, the title character calls this exercise in expressing gratitude “The Glad Game.”

Now really, my issues of the day (while still completely valid) are first-world problems. There are so many people in various parts of the world who would read this (well, maybe they wouldn’t, come to think of it) and say, “You have shoes??? A hairbrush??? A HOUSE??? Luckyyy!!!!!”

Many, if not most of us in America, are preparing to celebrate Thanksgiving Day in about a week. Let us strive to truly give thanks. As we eat our vittles and watch our football, may we take a moment to really be grateful for food, shelter, family, and entertainment. Too many will not enjoy the holiday. Resist bickering and love on one another. Consider taking leftovers (or an extra meal that you have prepared) to someone in need. If you are one of the lonely, needy people, I urge you to find something to be thankful for. It may change your outlook on the entire day.

May anyone who reads this be richly blessed, and may you always avoid stepping in abc gum.

*This first blog entry is dedicated to my beloved family, especially Robby, Julia, Charity, Hannah, and Natalie, without whom I would have nothing worthwhile to blog about. 🙂

*all links are for entertainment purposes only, and no copyright infringement is intended. The media contained within is the sole property of the source from whence it came, unless otherwise noted.

This photo was taken of my family at my friend Christy Doerr’s wedding. As soon as I find the name of the photographer, I will give her proper credit. I have been given permission to use this, either way. 🙂